Saturday, June 22, 2013

THIRTEEN Weird Things in Man of Steel


  1. Despite explaining in detail the various differences between Krypton and Earth, such as gravity, atmosphere and cellular structure, Kryptonians just happen to speak perfect English.
  2. After seeing Jax-Ur in Man of Steel, it’s great to find out that Krypton had evil German scientists too.
  3. They killed off Dr. Hamilton, a sort of go-to support character to Superman and the man worked for and at some point ran S.T.A.R. Labs. Now who will Superman ask when he doesn’t know how some futuristic weapon thingy works?
  4. While devising what Zod’s “World Engine” was trying to accomplish, Dr. Hamilton revealed that the villain was trying to turn Earth into Krypton. How the hell did he figure that out considering he had no knowledge of Superman’s home planet or even knew its name?
  5. In the old Superman movies, Kryptonian technology was all about white crystals. In Man of Steel, Kryptonian technology is all about morphing liquid nanotechnology.
  6. Wait, so Krypton had dragons?
  7. So all of the information about the entire Kryptonian civilization is in Superman’s blood? So if he gets a nose bleed, Krypton’s ‘Industrial Revolution’ could be lost?
  8. You would think that if Superman was so concerned about the safety and preservation of human life that he would have led the fighting away from Smallville and Metropolis rather than, you know, smash through a gas station and cause a massive fiery explosion.
  9. Was Kryptonian armor designed by H.R. Giger?
  10. Jor El, having been genetically bred to be a scientist, was a total bad ass that even defeated General Zod, who was genetically engineered to be a fierce warrior. (Note that while Jor El had the added determination of a ‘father protecting his son,’ Zod professed that his entire purpose was to defend Krypton. Zod knew that the Codex, representing the future of Krypton, was being launched into space with Jor El’s son. He should have been just as determined.)
  11. Jonathan Kent gave Clark lots of fatherly advice about choosing the correct path in life and being a good person… then was quick to tell Clark to never use his powers… Not even to save his fellow classmates from drowning!
  12. Jonathan Kent tells Clark not to save him from the approaching tornado, even though Clark could have probably moved fast enough not to have been seen by the other people. So Pa Kent just stands there? He doesn’t try to lie flat on the ground or huddle under a car? He just decides to traumatize his son and wife and the other witnesses? And how the hell was he able to stand so still next to a freakin’ tornado? The winds from those can be hundreds of miles an hour, I guarantee more than just his hair would be blown around.  
  13. Why was Superman’s outfit inside an ancient Kryptonian scout ship that had been trapped under ice for 18,000 years? And why did it have a cape?

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