On the Eighth Day of Christmas...

On the Eighth Day of Christmas, I saw on DVD… the Darkwing Duck episode “It’s a Beautiful Leaf.”

Most geeks who were children in the early 90’s have fond memories of Darkwing Duck. I was going to describe Darkwing Duck as a cross between Batman and the Shadow, but he was really more like the Shadow (which is funny as Batman was heavily based on the Shadow). DW wore a similar outfit to the Shadow complete with a long brimmed hat, he relied heavily on smoke clouds and even had a trademark line used to scare baddies (“I am the terror who quacks in the night…” versus “Who knows what even lurks in the hearts of men...”). Unlike Batman or the Shadow, Darkwing Duck was an ego-driven borderline bumbling idiot; after all, the show was a comedy. 

 So “It’s a Wonderful Leaf” starts out in a busy (and by busy I mean those videos you see on YouTube of near riots at Black Friday sales) shopping mall where people are fighting each other over basic items. Dr. Bushroot, the plant-duck villain, is try to shop but due to his wimpy nature is getting pummeled and abused.

You know what, I’m going to stop right here. Dr. Bushroot was lame. There, I said it. He was this pathetic wuss-bag who was turned into a plant creature with control of other plants… and still managed to be a pathetic wuss-bag. Being a plant guy with plant control powers? He could have been immensely powerful! (Just as Swamp Thing!) Instead, he was just sad. Why couldn’t this Christmas episode have one of Darkwing’s cooler villains like Nega-Duck, Steelbeak, Megavolt (most people’s favorite) or hell, how about Quacker Jack? The psychotic, toy-obsessed clown duck guy would have been perfect for Christmas. But alas… we got Bushroot.

(I am reminded of a quote from the Clerks Animated Series: “Next week a better episode, but for now… courage.”)

So to get revenge, Bushroot vows to ruin everyone’s Christmas by taking over Christmas trees and commanding them to do his bidding. His bidding is apparently playing pranks on people and committing acts of petty larceny. That’ll show them. Even his evil schemes are lame!

So in the meantime, Drake Mallard (Darkwing’s mild-mannered alter ego) is attempting to keep his adopted daughter Gosalyn from peaking at her Christmas presents. (I don’t know why he didn’t hide the gifts and put them out on Christmas Eve after she went to bed, but I am arguing with a show about an anthropomorphic duck crime fighter and I don’t even drink.) Eventually Darkwing had to fight Christmas trees and Bushroot. Oh, and Gosalyn gave her presents to her friend Honker after a tree stole his gifts. How nice.

I could seriously name off ten episodes of Darkwing Duck I would have rather watched off the top of my head. (Challenge accepted: The introduction of Megavolt, both the Justice Ducks episodes, the one where Steelbeak stopped the Earth’s rotation, Quacker Jack’s debut, the one where Darkwing went blind, the one where Darkwing got spider powers, the one where Darkwing got super speed, the introduction of the Liquidator, and most definitely “Dark Warrior Duck.” Booyah!) This wasn’t that great an episode. Bushroot’s plan was stupid. I don’t remember ever seeing this one, but if I did, I probably repressed it out of boredom. Damn you Bushroot!

On the Merry Meter, I give “It’s a Wonderful Leaf” a 3 out of 10. 

Tune in tomorrow when Black Dynamite learns the true meaning of Christmas... or just kicks some ass. Either way, I'm happy!