Just in Time For Christmas... It's More Movie Lessons!

Lost Boys – Children are perfectly capable of killing several vampires all by themselves.

Live Free or Die Hard – John McClane can defy physics.

Monster Squad – Using dynamite, Dracula will destroy the tree houses of the school children who threaten him.  

Home Alone – A child can effectively take out a couple of burglars invading his home using a series of traps.

Skyfall – A secret agent can effectively take out a small army of mercenaries invading his home using a series of traps.

Young Guns – Hollywood will never let a little thing like “historical accuracy” get in the way of an outlandish and contrived story.

Harry Potter and the Sorceror’s Stone – Americans are too stupid to know what a Philosopher’s Stone is, despite the film explaining it. 

Prometheus – Following directions to an alien world laid out on a prehistoric cave painting is not only a great idea but will lead to a wonderful adventure filled with genetic abominations.

Westworld – Don’t pick fights with robot gunslingers.

Zardoz – Only Sean Connery is man enough to pull off red bandoleers, red thigh high hooker boots and a speedo and still be sexier than you. 

Fight Club – Liposuctioned fat makes for great soap.

Cloak and Dagger – Imaginary friends are awesome!

The Matrix – Downloading martial arts techniques into one’s brain will instantly make that person a master of Kung Fu, completely bypassing the many years of rigorous physical training and intense mental discipline that everyone else must endure.  

The Avengers – It is a great idea to have your massive flying aircraft carrier cloaked into invisibility while in midair where, you know, airliner jets fly.

The Dark Knight Rises – If terrorists with a make-shift nuclear weapon take an entire major American city hostage, the United States government will just have a “wait and see” attitude.